The Power of Pre-Making Decisions: Why Decide in the Moment if You Can Decide in Advance?

Earlier this year, I gave up a free trip to the Philippines.

I’ve always wanted to visit Asia, and the trip landed in my lap. One of my best friends called and said he’d be taking a work trip there in a few weeks, and he had a free companion fare that was about to expire. He also said I could crash on the other bed in his hotel room. Free trip!

The trip sounded awesome, and I love traveling with this friend, but I said no because I already had plans around town with other friends that weekend.

And even though it pained me to miss out on that awesome trip, I didn’t have to think very hard about the decision.

Oddly enough, I had essentially decided what I would do in that situation years earlier.

As one of my life rules, I’ve “pre-decided” that whenever I have plans with someone, I won’t cancel them even if a better opportunity comes along.

Pre-Decision: “Whenever [this situation] arises, I’m going to [take this action].”

I made that decision because I was tired of letting people down. I was frustrated at myself for all of the times I had skipped out on a commitment because someone later invited me to something that sounded more fun.

The power of pre-decisions

This life choice has caused me to miss big sporting events, parties with friends, and other fun activities. But it has also helped me fulfill my commitments, become a better friend, and prioritize ethics over enjoyment.

Not to mention, this single pre-decision has saved me hours of anxiety trying to decide what to do.

I don’t share this story with you to explain why you need to adopt this single life decision of honoring an original commitment. I share it because this story illustrates the power of pre-making decisions.

One pre-decision can prevent a thousand one-off decisions. And that is a game-changer.

I’ve made countless other pre-decisions throughout the years.

In college, I told my best friend that I’d be there for him anytime, day or night — to talk through tough breakups, challenging homework assignments, or anything else that arose. I prioritized that friendship over sleep. That pre-decision caused a few sleepless nights, but whenever I heard a knock on my door at 2 A.M., I knew what I needed to do, and a lifelong friendship was forged.

Several years ago, I decided that I wanted to run more, so I pre-decided I would wake up early every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday morning to run before work. When my alarm clock buzzed in the morning, what percentage of the time do you think I wanted to go running? (Answer: MAYBE ten percent of the time.) But alas, I had already pre-decided, so I rolled out of bed and laced up my running shoes.

Billionaire hedge fund manager Ray Dalio wrote an entire book about this concept. In Principles: Life and Work, Dalio says, “Without principles, we would be forced to react to all the things life throws at us individually, as if we were experiencing each of them for the first time.” [Footnote 1]

Dalio goes on to say the following:

“Using principles is a way of both simplifying and improving your decision making…This will allow you to massively reduce the number of decisions you have to make (I estimate by a factor of something like 100,000) and will lead you to make much better ones. The key to doing this well is to:

1. Slow down your thinking so you can note the criteria you are using to make your decision.
2. Write the criteria down as a principle.
3. Think about those criteria when you have an outcome to assess, and refine them before the next ‘one of those’ comes along.”

Dalio’s book contains hundreds of principles (pre-decisions) that guide his daily decision-making.

How to apply this concept to your life

Maybe you’ve been dominating discussions at work, and you want to talk less and listen more. You may decide that whenever you’re considering whether to say something in a meeting, you’ll stay silent for a full minute before speaking up — at which point you’ll be able to gauge whether your comment will add value.

Or maybe you’re watching what you eat, but you’re mindful of how much more expensive it is to purchase healthy food. You could pre-decide that when faced with a choice between a low-cost, unhealthy option (e.g., McDonald’s) and a high-cost, healthy one (e.g., the fancy salad place down the street), you’ll spend the extra money and pick the healthy option.

The key is to determine the rules that will govern your behavior in specific situations. Pre-decide what you should do.

Tips for pre-making decisions

1. Consider which decisions you need to make over and over.

What decisions exhaust you? What sucks up endless time that could be avoided with a pre-decision?

If you notice the same situation cropping up time and again, determine how you’ll handle that situation in the future. Be explicit with yourself by putting your answer in this formula:

In [this specific situation], I’m going to [take this specific action].

2. Tell others about your pre-decisions.

Years ago, I missed my brother’s birthday party. It was scheduled last minute, and I already had other plans that evening.

One or two of my family members were initially upset when I said I wouldn’t attend the party, but then another family member reminded them: “This is Bobby’s rule. You know how important prior commitments are to him.”

Communicating my philosophy earlier had greased the skids for future tough situations. After all, my family had benefited in the past from me honoring my commitments when other alternatives arose, which made it easier when the roles were reversed.

3. Give yourself grace.

Sometimes it’s necessary to break one of your personal rules.

Maybe your sister announces she’s going to get married the first Saturday of October, but you already committed to see a Maroon 5 concert with your best friend that night. I can’t exactly tell you what to do, but…go to your sister’s wedding!

Never let a good life philosophy get in the way of a necessary life choice. The point isn’t to shackle yourself to a decision no matter what. It’s to come up with general principles to guide your life, then do your absolute darndest to honor them.

What decisions ( large or small )  do you find yourself facing time and again?

Save yourself the time, mental energy, stress, and guilt by making some pre-decisions.

Your future self will be glad you did.